My ramblings on "Beauty"

A few weeks ago a friend asked me to come talk to young girls about "Beauty"...what that is...what it looks like...and ultimately what that looks like as a Christian woman...to overcome past hurt and/or misconceptions of who we are and how we see ourselves.

The first word and/or thought that came into my mind was "eyes"...the eyes are the passageway to the heart.

beau·ty
noun /ˈbyo͞otē/ 
beauties, plural

*A combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, esp. the sight

*A combination of qualities that pleases the intellect or moral sense


I think all woman (and a lot of men) can go back to places in their lives where something was said and done to make you feel less as a person....less attractive...less talented...less intriguing... We all have those moments. The ones that go down to the deepest parts. That have scar tissue around them...that sometimes we pick at and cause to bleed again. Unfortunately sometimes causing it to bleed again causes comfort...as twisted as that sounds.

For me, one of the people who caused the greatest damage to the way I see myself is my own grandmother...and honestly to this day I struggle with time to time on how I view me. She made it clear that my brother was better than me and that I was the fat little girl that was not talented or could ever amount to much. Even as a teenager when I would go on walks with her and guys would honk...she would always make it known that they were honking for her because she had such GREAT legs. I look back and I laugh now....but at a young age she started in on me...and how insufficient I was. Yea, I was teased in Jr. High....shoot....those are some awkward years in life. I had a stress disorder that caused my scalp to flake out of control...I got super chunky....I was called ewok cause of my big eyes....the list goes on...it happens...kids can just be plain cruel. BUT the fact stands that I am sure most of those kids don't even remember what they said or how they acted.

Funny enough...my other grandma was in the hospital getting a blood transfusion the other day and her nurse was a gal I went to jr. high with. Some way or another I came up and the gal told my grandma she knew me and thought I was such a sweetheart and keeps up with me on Facebook. The funny thing is...is she was one of the girls that was mean to me...yet she doesn't remember that...she remembers how I RESPONDED to her. Even my parents in their counseling met other people who knew me and thought highly of me...and my memories of them are not so great. Let's face it I was a target in Jr. High and very much a LATE BLOOMER! hahahaha

We also may have that guy/girl past and or possibly present relationship that did some pretty hurtful and deceitful stuff that cause us to doubt our self worth....wonder what we did wrong....what is wrong with us emotionally/physically....why we aren't good enough. OR even better yet a boss or co-worker who makes you feel incapable...makes you feel like you can't do it...micromanaging...not allowing growth or enabling you to grow thus making you feel unimportant or not of value...that all the work you do still isn't enough...thus you work yourself harder and to the bone to constantly prove yourself and your worth....

All that to say...a lot of our insecurities about our looks and abilities stem from something that was probably said out of someone else's insecurities...and they probably didn't/don't even think twice about what they said because they already forgot they said it or are trying to make themselves feel better...and we enable them to have power over us...to make us feel less...to hold us back from what HE has for us. LET IT GO!!!! We are all so gifted and talented in so many different ways...ways that we should all appreciate and that can compliment one another!

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"

We all have our own style, our own look, our own talents....that's one of the things that I love...we are not cookie cutter...we ALL have something to add to this world/life. My friend who is a stay-at-home-mom is just as talented as one of the musicians I work with...it's just a different "gift"....a different "beauty"

And to wrap up my ramblings on "Beauty"....and back to the first thought that came into my mind..."eyes"....the passageway to the heart...the whole package on "Beauty" is not just outward beauty for that shall surely fade, but it is the inward beauty as well...that tends to shine greater than any outward beauty could. The way you love others, the way you encourage, the way you help friends in need, the way you give to a total stranger, the way you respond when someone is being hurtful, the heart of compassion and love towards the Lord who is "the author and finisher of our faith." God has made us all so unique! Don't let others out of their own hurt or discontent hurt you. Watch how you react. Embrace your difference and your gift and use it to glorify Him....for He did not give you that "gift" - "beauty" for nothing. Let your eyes convey the "Beauty" that is you - which in turn should lead to Christ - what He's done in your life and what He has given you.


sidenote: cause we all know I am a cheesy person....think on Top Model...in all the pictures they wanted the EYES to be the expression....to be fierce...to be innnocent...to ultimately show what was going on inside cause that would convey enough....LET YOUR eyes convey what you are....who you are...and what is going on inside. I know by looking into someone's eyes what they are feeling...happy, sad, confused, joy, anger, allergies....your eyes are very TELLING!

I would rather be known as a Proverbs 31 woman...than a woman who's "beauty" fades....